“His Integrity” and Proverbs 31:23

Amazingly, once again the topic from our reading and the Scripture in Proverbs 31 have the same theme!  This week we are talking about a man of integrity.  Stormie eloquently writes, “Integrity is not what you appear to be when all eyes are on you.  It’s who you are when no one is looking.”

The chapter we read from The Power of a Praying Wife was “His Integrity”.

Things that touched me:

1. While explaining a man of integrity, Stormie writes “His goal is to please God and do what is right.  A man can be highly esteemed among men but an abomination to God (Luke 16:15).”  In Luke 16:15 Jesus says, “And he said unto them, Ye are they which justify yourselves before men; but God knoweth your hearts: for that which is highly esteemed among men is abomination in the sight of God.”  Jesus is speaking to the Pharisees.  These religious rulers were all about making a show before men.  God wants us to love Him with our hearts not play the religion game.
2. Stormie brings up Psalm 5; I included the whole chapter.  Psalms 15:1-5  “A Psalm of David. LORD, who shall abide in thy tabernacle? who shall dwell in thy holy hill?  (2)  He that walketh uprightly, and worketh righteousness, and speaketh the truth in his heart.  (3)   He that backbiteth not with his tongue, nor doeth evil to his neighbour, nor taketh up a reproach against his neighbour.  (4)  In whose eyes a vile person is contemned; but he honoureth them that fear the LORD.  He that sweareth to his own hurt, and changeth not.  (5)   He that putteth not out his money to usury, nor taketh reward against the innocent. He that doeth these things shall never be moved.”  David shows us that a man (or woman) of integrity doesn’t gossip, is kind to his neighbor, keeps his word even if it hurts him, uses money wisely, and does not use people.
3. Stormie reminds us of Proverbs 20:7 “The just man walketh in his integrity: his children are blessed after him.” She writes, “Whether my children fully recognize it or not, they will receive a heritage from their father’s adherence to the principles of high moral integrity.”  A man can leave a powerful legacy for his children.
4. Stormie writes, “Integrity happens in the heart.  Therefore, being a man of integrity is something your husband must choose to do on his own.  But you can prayerfully help him fight the enemy that seeks to snare him, blind him, and keep him from making that decision.”  Your husband can choose which way his heart will go, but your prayers can help bring God’s guidance to the situation.
5. Proverbs 28:6  “Better is the poor that walketh in his uprightness, than he that is perverse in his ways, though he be rich.”  The Bible states clearly that it is better to be honest, upright, and poor than to be rich, dishonest, and perverse.

I didn’t find anything in this chapter that I respectfully disagree with.

Proverbs 31:23 “Her husband is known in the gates, when he sitteth among the elders of the land.“

In this verse, we focus on Mr. Proverbs 31.  We begin to see a little more how the virtuous woman compliments this respected man.

He is a well-known elder.  He was considered wise because Proverbs 24:7 says, “Wisdom is too high for a fool: he openeth not his mouth in the gate.”  He was not a fool.

It is hard for a man to be respected with contentious or odious wife.  We see that his wife is not the woman from the following verses:

Proverbs 27:15-16  “A continual dropping in a very rainy day and a contentious woman are alike.  (16)  Whosoever hideth her hideth the wind, and the ointment of his right hand, which bewrayeth itself.”

Proverbs 30:21-23  “For three things the earth is disquieted, and for four which it cannot bear:  (22)  For a servant when he reigneth; and a fool when he is filled with meat;  (23)  For an odious woman when she is married; and an handmaid that is heir to her mistress.”

Rather, she is a crown to her husband.  Proverbs 12:4  “A virtuous woman is a crown to her husband: but she that maketh ashamed is as rottenness in his bones.”  Do others feel sorry for your husband because you are a witch, a nag, lazy, irresponsible, a busy-body, or the like?  Or, are you a crown to him because you are a princess, an encouragement, a hard-worker, responsible, not in other people’s business, and the like?

Remember that submission is not only bringing honor to our husband but also to our Heavenly Father!

Let’s look a little more at this husband.  The Proverbs 31 man is not at the forefront of the passages, but he is definitely there.  The virtuous woman has a virtuous man.  His love and encouragement help her.  Let’s look at what we have learned about him from today’s Scripture then look at what else we can learn about him.

1.  The Proverbs 31 man is well-respected in his community.

We remember way back in our introduction to the Proverbs 31 woman that in Proverbs 31:1 King Lemuel was taught these wise sayings by his mother.  King Lemuel thought highly enough of his mother to include her wisdom in the Scriptures!

2.  The Proverbs 31 man honors his momma and probably all women.

In Proverbs 31:28, we see that the Proverbs 31 man praises his wife. His children learn to honor their mother by his good example.

3.  The Proverbs 31 man pay compliments to his wife.

Proverbs 31:31 says “Give her of the fruit of her hands; and let her own works praise her in the gates.”  I take this to mean that King Lemuel’s mom is directing her son to reward his virtuous wife for her hard work.

4.  The Proverbs 31 man rewards his wife for her hard work.

Some obvious observations warrant mentioning.  Let’s take note that this Proverbs 31 man is a family man.  He isn’t a live-in boyfriend, a boyfriend, or a man who comes and goes as he pleases.  He is the committed husband of the Proverbs 31 woman.

5.  The Proverbs 31 man is a committed husband and family man.

The household of Proverbs 31 is one of love, trust, and working well together.  This shows that the Proverbs 31 man is not a dictator who has taken his role too far.  He lovingly leads his family, and you can see this by the freedoms of his wife.  She is not cowering in the corner due to an overpowering husband.  Of course, she has proven herself trustworthy, but he gave her the freedom to do so.

6.  The Proverbs 31 man knows how to rule his household with love.

The Proverbs 31 woman is able to have some financial freedom.  This shows that the Proverbs 31 man is providing financial stability.  She is able to have servants, bring food from afar, buy a field, plant a vineyard, and make clothes from costly fabrics.

7.  The Proverbs 31 man provides financial stability to his household.

The Proverbs 31 woman gives freely to the needy (Prov 31:20).  Being a virtuous woman and an excellent wife, I’m positive that the Proverbs 31 woman isn’t sneaking behind her husband’s back and giving to the poor.  I’m sure that her husband has agreed to her giving generously.  This, in turn, shows that he is generous.

8.  The Proverbs 31 man is generous with the poor.

We’ve learned that the Proverbs 31 man is an elder, but is he a man who puts on a good face in public and is very different at home?  Is he a hypocrite?  I don’t think so.  We’ve already seen his many upright qualities both at home and in public.

9.  The Proverbs 31 man is not a hypocrite.

I did not list all these things so that we, as ladies, are off the hook.  Husbands and wives are both imperfect and sinful.  God wants us to obey him despite our circumstances, despite our imperfections, and despite the imperfections of our spouse.  I included these things because I have never spent much time thinking about the Proverbs 31 man.  Also, if you are not married, these are the qualities to look for in a husband 🙂

Your assignment for week 16:  Read Chapter 15 of The Power of a Praying Wife “His Reputation”.  What touched you?  Any disagreements?  Pray that your husband will be of a good reputation.  Also, study and ruminate on Proverbs 31:24.